Tuesday, August 2, 2016

Trump Orange Chicken

I throw my whisk into the political arena with a recipe that is both delicious and revolting: Trump Orange Chicken. If it's not obvious to you, the delish part is Orange Chicken, while the 2016 Republican presidential candidate, Donald Trump, is the latter.

Now that the buffoon has buffaloed the conservative populace, and belittled the other Republican presidential has-beens off the political stage, it's down to big cheddar cheese-tinted Trump. So in anticipation of the future tweeting Troll-in-Chief's Inauguration Day, I've come up with a tasty entree to serve for his first White House meal: Trump Orange Chicken.

Since much Trump-branded product is made in foreign countries like China, I thought an Asian inspired entree appropriate. For the future Bully Of The Free World orange is the new white, especially when he has the coloring of a slice of American Cheese.

The main ingredients are cheap to get these days. First, chicken is perfect for a tough-talking Cheeto-in-Chief, as it symbolizes his cowardice: getting 5 draft deferments to stay out of the Vietnam War during its apex, even after being a decorated cadet from the New York Military Academy.

This is the same guy who said, reacting to criticism from Senator John McCain (a tortured Vietnam War prisoner,) "He's not a war hero...I like people that weren't captured, okay?"

Boy, I can't wait to see him salute the troops off, as he sends them to win the war on terrorism. Here's his cowardly statement that you can see for yourself.

Video runs 1 minute, 4 seconds.

When I get skinless and boneless chicken from my local Latin grocery store, I don't stop to wonder if it was prepared along the way by Mexican rapists and drug dealers, as xenophobe Trump would have it. And I didn't climb over or dig under a wall to get budget poultry. If you have an ethnic market in the neighborhood, do visit it sometime, and don't be frightened away by Trump's race baiting. Welcoming a mosaic of world cultures makes America truly great.

Fresh squeezed orange juice is the basis of my Orange Sauce recipe. But you can use any favorite grocery store frozen juice. After Trump's tan is freshly applied, I wonder if he perspires in orange? A disgusting thought, but not as deplorable as Trump's comments about women.

Click on any photo to see larger.

POTUS wannbe Trump once ran his own meat market, the Miss Universe pageant, and had the chutzpah to use it as a reference of his international diplomatic prowess to deal with Russian President Vladimir Putin - God, what a putz. And just as disgraceful is watching the RNC, conservative websites, and Fox (fake) News kingmakers applying lipstick on a chauvinist pig.

Having run a beauty pageant makes the possible Fake-Tan-In-Chief a great judge of a woman's worth - like the time he referred to fellow Republican presidential candidate Carly Fiorina in a Rolling Stone magazine interview: "Look at that face," he said. "Would anyone vote for that?" And adding "Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?" Yep, that's the Donald at his slimy best. Elect this childish potty mouth and we'll soon learn how he rates all the female world leaders he will negotiate with.

Video runs 54 seconds.

This is a fried chicken recipe so a lot of cooking oil is needed. But you'll drain the fried chicken, so it's not too bad. But for something really oily, look no further than the business dealing of a mogul born with a gold plated pacifier stuffed between his puckered lips. Nothing like starting out in life with a Daddy Warbucks to fill in life's potholes and financially clean up your early failures.

For every Trump self-aggrandizing business success, there's a trail of stiffed contractors, tax dodges and bankruptcies, like the Taj Mahal Casino in Atlantic City. Hey, you win a few and lose a few, can't knock the guy for trying...except when the United States economy is on the chopping block with Trump wielding the butcher's knife.

My Trump Orange Chicken fillets are cut into bite sizes and crunchy coated. But what brings them over the top is a homemade sticky sweet Orange Sauce.

The Republican party is lapping up the sickly-sweet orange poison Kool-Aide Trump ladles out. Like his coifed comb over in a political windstorm, Trump adjusts his views in any direction. Future Egomanic-in-Chief  Donald Trump is a con artist, and only entered the presidential race to publicize the Trump brand. And the Republican Party has fallen for it hook, line, and sinker.

One year he's supports abortion, now he wants to punish women who get one; he supported the Iraq war at first, now is against it; once he suggested a ban on assault rifles before becoming another lapdog of the NRA.

And one of his biggest flip flops? Straight from the jackass's, I mean horse's, mouth here's Trump's praise of Democrats, and his support of  Hillary Clinton as a diplomat. Just check out the interview video:

Video runs 1 minute, 55 seconds.

Adding President of the United States to his resume will line the Trump brand's pockets with speaking fees, and create a gusher of Trump media hogwash. Ugh, now we have Donald Trump's toxic progeny, and cheated upon ex-wifes, to follow on social media  - a political version of the Kardashians.

However much you may disagree (or tire) with my ranting, you can't deny my Trump Orange Chicken is a qualified success, both in flavor and appearance.

This recipe is for both political parties, and even independents can join in. So make the right choice this election year and serve my latest bipartisan recipe. Your dining guests will surely give you a landslide of compliments!

Orange is the new white.

  • 4 pieces of chicken - boneless and skinless. I used 2 thighs and legs. Okay to use a whole chicken breast.
  • Salt and pepper to taste - optional. Soy sauce has plenty of salt for me.
  • Oil for frying - about 1/2 deep in a frying pan.

Frying Batter
  • 1 egg
  • 3/4 cup flour
  • 1/4 cup cornstarch
  • 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1/2 cup water - start with 1/4 cup of water. Stir, then add a tablespoon at a time, to reach a pancake batter consistency. Total amount of water is about 1/2 cup.

Orange Sauce

  • 3/4 cup orange juice - fresh squeezed or bottled.
  • 1/2 teaspoon orange zest - optional
  • 1 tablespoon soy sauce
  • 1 teaspoon honey - or favorite sweetener
  • 1 teaspoon vinegar - I used apple cider.
  • 2 tablespoons cornstarch - to thicken sauce. Use one tablespoon cornstarch for a thinner sauce.
  • 1 teaspoon ginger - optional.  Fresh chopped or from jar.

Directions for Orange Sauce

Orange zest is pungent. Use a grater to remove some orange peel. It can be grated or just peeled. Try not to include the white bitter pith, just below the bright orange peel. This is optional.

Over a medium heat, add all orange sauce ingredients to a pot. Add orange zest. Mix well.

Click on any photo to see larger.

Finally mix in cornstarch. Make sure to stir and dissolve cornstarch.

Bring sauce up to a low simmer. Reduce sauce to low heat. Sauce will thicken as you cook up the chicken pieces. Sauce should only take 3-5 minutes to thicken. Add a little water if sauce gets too thick, like jam.

Okay to turn off sauce heat, then reheat when ready to mix with finished fried chicken.

Directions for chicken batter and frying

Prepare chicken if necessary. I used skinless and boneless dark meat. All I had to do was slice chicken pieces into bite sizes.

Mix dry ingredients in a wide bowl. Slowly stir in water and mix with dry ingredients until a pancake-like batter is formed.

Heat 1/2 inch of oil in a wide frying pan. Use a medium heat. Get the oil hot, to about 300 degrees. I don't use a thermometer, as my gas stove temp settings are close enough.

When oil is hot time to fry the chicken. First set out the chicken pieces and dip them in batter. Add coated chicken pieces to hot oil.

Mainly, you want the coated chicken to bubble when in contact with hot oil. Be careful when adding the first piece of wet coated chicken to hot oil.

When chicken is added to pan, it's best not to move chicken pieces around - just let them cook for 3-5 minutes each side. When you see browning along the edges of chicken then it's fine to check for a golden color.

Check thickest chicken piece for doneness. Just remove a piece and slice into it. There should be not red or pink juices. Dark meat takes longer than white meat to cook through. Cooking time will vary depending how hot the oil is and how thick you slice the chicken pieces.

Place fried chicken on a wire rack or paper towels to drain off some oil.

Reheat Orange Sauce if necessary. Place cooked chicken in a bowl and pour in the Orange Sauce to coat chicken. Lightly mix. Okay to just pour on Orange Sauce over chicken when you serve it, too.

You can serve Trump Orange Chicken over white or brown rice, or with a favorite side dish.



B-School Schmuck said...

Wow, that was an incredibly stupid post. I had no idea you were such a tool.

Cris said...

This post is hilarious and well needed. If that guy manages to win after his foul mouth, not sure what country moving to! haha Cheers 99cent chef. Always enjoy your recipes.

Sandy Shoop said...

I love your recipes! Have been following them for quite a while!
It sure is a good thing that you can cook, because if you are a follower of the progressive/socialist George Soros and the murdering traitor Hillary, you will undoubtedly be wearing a burka before long, and shariah law will be in your future.
I will pray for you.
TRUMP 2016! He is the dragon slayer who will put an end to the corruption going on in D.C. and FINALLY bring some class to the White House.
Not too smart on your part to ruin your recipe blog with politics...

yardsailor said...

How can there be no comments, I loved your Trump saga, lately I have been controlling myself on Facebook, I will not post an anti trump meme if it shows his gross countenance, I had become a serious Trump Dumper, I am now in control again, trying to anyway. Keep up the Trump bashing, even if only sane people are reading it.

Louise said...

Great humor. I can't wait to try the recipe too. Cheers! Louise

Billy Vasquez said...

hi Louise, it's actually tasty, even with the nauseating recipe name ;-p

Billy Vasquez said...

hey B-School Smuck, you the fool. My post lays it all out with Trump's own hypocritical, deplorable and bulling words in the video clips - there's really nothing more to add, just listen and try to actually fathom the con he pulled on you and the rest of the Republican party, couldn't be more clear ;-p

Billy Vasquez said...

Well, Sandy my dear, no need to pray for me, just pray for yourself that the fog of conspiracy theories, paranoia and hate that you are lost in will clear one day - best to stay away from Fox "fake" News and other conservative hate websites, for your own peace of mind.

If you disliked my political tinged post then please don't read my recipe for "Tea Party Chicken Soup," where I throw my weight behind Obamacare -- your head may explode ;-p

Sandy Shoop said...

Love your recipes, Billy... don't care what you call them. As far as politics are concerned, I don't incorporate them into my cooking. A lot of my recipes have been passed down from my mother, grandmother and great-grandmother. As I am 80 years old now, my family recipes are quite dated (as am I) and I like new ideas. You supply quite a few new ideas for cooking, and I like them. As for politics, it is YOUR world now.. One that you and our grandchildren and great grandchildren will be living in long after I am gone. I have no hate for anyone... am beyond that. My time growing up was in the 50's - so glad I was part of that era! God things can't last forever tho.. so whichever way the world chooses to go (looks like they will be choosing One World Order with the libs in power), I hope everyone will either celebrate that, or not suffer too much when the Jihad comes.. Like I said, I just continue to collect recipes because I enjoy cooking so much. Cheers, and keep those good recipes coming! ;-)

Billy Vasquez said...

Hi Sandy, glad you get a kick out of my recipes. It's seldom that I combine politics with food, but sometimes it's fun to just go for it, especially now, with such entertaining candidates (and so much on the line.)

I'm glad the '50's were a great time for you holding great memories. Unfortunately, if you were black, a minority, or homosexual, those "good old days" may not have been that good. I lived in the South (Texas and Louisiana) during the 1960's, were our small town movie house had a "Negroes only" balcony; some water fountains were "whites only;" and on the first day of school, our local junior high driveway entrance was filled with white adults picketing black school children on the bus I was in, the first day of forced integration because of the Civil Rights Act of 1964.

And my mother wasn't allowed to go to college (after qualifying for a scholarship) because her parents thought higher education was not suitable for women.

I guess we had a taste of our own Western-style Sharia laws of lynching and homosexual persecution back in the good old days. As for Jihad, it's another brand of religious hate that will eventually fail. Democracy will always be tested, it's up to each of us to recognize bigots like Trump, offering naive quick fixes.

Every generation must strive to make our society more equal for all. Trump embodies the worst aspects of the 1950's with his condescending and degrading comments about women, hate speech directed at Mexicans, and rolling back of gay marriage rights.

And especially galling is Trump's (and Republican's) disrespectful treatment of our first Black President. How do you think this looks to our neighbors impressionable black children? What kind of example are we setting?

Four years ago, my wife and I had a viewing party on Obama's inauguration day, and some of our black neighbors were gracious enough to come over (I made a delish breakfast frittata for all.) I'll never forget the tears streaming down their faces as Obama was sworn in. I'm sure the same proud feelings from many women, young and old alike, will be there as Hillary breaks through the ultimate glass ceiling. Liberal Democrats are leading the inclusive way.

Trump is the least qualified Presidential candidate to ever run - I had to take sides in this election, even in my silly food blog. And if all goes well, chauvinist Trump will have a comeuppance November 8th, defeated by a feminist Presidential candidate.

By the way Sandy, I don't know if you have seen my Mom in action in some of my cooking videos, she turns 82 in November, and is voting for Hillary! We live in a great society were a brilliant Black man and a liberated, capable, and hard working woman are Presidential, too bad about half our country refuses to acknowledge it.

Sandy Shoop said...

Hi Billy... Thank you for responding to me! Not often that I can get a response from anyone.. pro OR con!
I can appreciate your feelings after what you and your family went through.. those times were horrible.. just as these times are horrible. I can remember my grandmother telling me, back in 1950, that she was glad she was as old as she was, because the world had become such a horrible place. She said she felt sorry for me, having to grow up in terrible times. Funny... I was 14 then... and my growing up times weren't terrible at all.. to me. Now, I look at my great grandchildren (28 of them) and feel sorry that they are growing up in such a terrible world. ALL is in the eye of the beholder, isn't it?
I spent my first 6 years on Catalina Island.. my dad and mom owned a flower shop. The made leis to sell when the big ocean liners docked there twice a week. When Dec. 7, 1941 happened, we had tarpaper over the windows for the next 6 weeks, waiting for the navy to take over the island. My parents declared bankruptcy after the government took everything over... everyone lost their houses and businesses. We moved in with my great grandmother in Los Angeles.. we were the only white family in a black/Asian neithborhood. (My great grandmother had moved there 30 years before, and stayed when all the white folks moved out). Anyway, I started school (there was one other white boy in the school). I never learned to dislike any of my new friends.. they came to my house, I went to theirs.. I particularly liked to go to the neighbors across the street where where there were 9 children.. they were Mexican, and I learned to like tacos, etc when there. Then, the black family had food different than we did too, and I always wanted to eat with the neighbors. In my house, we ate a lot of salads, soups, and pot roast on Sunday. ;-)
Anyway, we finally moved, and I ended up in an all white neighborhood. When I was in the 9th grade, we had a Japanese exchange student come over who was a football player. I really liked him.. Kenny Matsuda.. a neat guy. I guess being raised on the West coast may have made a difference .. if I had been raised in the South or the East, I might have been instilled with different values. As it was, I was more involved with movies and movie stars, as one of my cousins went into the movies (her stage name was Loretta Young) and her sister was an exotic dancer. Another one of her sisters married a South American guy (Ricardo Montalban) Our family was ok with that, because she had been dating one of the dead end kids from the movies ad they sent her to South America on vacation to get her away from him, where she met Ricardo.
All the women in my family were great cooks.. they were always sharing recipes, and coming up with different ideas for family get togethers. I guess I inherited the love of cooking, hence my attraction to the 99 cent chef.
As far as politics go.. my family were all democrats up until Roosevelt died.. I don't remember much about politics after that.. was too busy with my life.. then later on I got ivolved during the Kennedy election. I liked Obama at first, then didn't like the things he did, and never did like Hillary... so we can agree to disagree on that point. Personally, I think they should put those 535 politicians in D.C. on a 2 year term limit, and make their retirement be 50% of their salary, and make them pay for all of their own stuff... just like the rest of us. This is what makes the world go 'round... diversity! Diversity in everything.. including recipes..I'll have to watch your Mom's cooking videos!
Take care,

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