How Does You Garden Grow?

 With the last overnight freeze hopefully gone, I'm planting tomatoes and other summer veggies in the month of April. So let's visit my local Nursery in Marina Del Rey, now called Flora Grubb Gardens (the original name was Marina Del Rey Garden Center).

 Last month, I replaced my topsoil with fresh compost that I make from used coffee grounds and veggie scraps. And in the last two weeks, I've made many trips to the Flora Grubb Gardens for tomato, lettuce, and herb seedlings.

And I especially like the variety of lettuce flats -- everything from Mesclun Mix to Red Buttercrunch and Gourmet Salad Blend. They also have a small orchard of budding fruit trees, some starting to bear fruit -- so you know your first crop is definitely on the way.

You can't get fresher produce than growing your own. And in my latest zany film foray, this green-thumbed budget horticulturist takes you on a tasty garden trek, with camera in hand. Now, you know this will not be a typical tour. Where The 99 Cent Chef goes, high jinx follow!

The Flora Grubb Gardens staff is knowledgeable and helpful, while giving you the space to explore on your own. You will see how the Cheapskate Forager takes full advantage of nature's bounty!

It's hard to resist plucking and tasting a tart Kumquat from a branch weighed down with the colorful fruit, and I'm sure everyone has snagged a Strawberry, Blackberry, or a Grape or two from budding bushes displayed for sale. But, no one has gone to the extremes that the Chintzy Gardener goes in this latest docu-comedy video.

This time around, I had some help from a couple of 99 Cent Players. Making her first appearance is Garden Master Elissa (a workmate & cool drummer), while the Omniscient Voice at the end is provided by my neighbor, and frequent contributor, Pete, a comedian and actor. Both Elissa and Pete provided additional camerawork, too. 99 thanks to them, and also to the Flora Grubb Gardens and all their nursery gardeners.

So sit back and let me give you a comedic tour of the Flora Grubb Gardens. It comes with a warning, though: don't try what you see here at your own local nursery -- I'd hate to have to bail you out of the slammer!

Dining in the Flora Grubb Gardens - VIDEO

Play it here. Video runs 4 minutes 45 seconds.

To view or embed from YouTube, click here.

Flora Grubb Gardens 

13198 Mindanao Way

Marina Del Rey, CA 90292

hours: 9am to 6pm. Open 7 days.

Phone: 310-823-5956

Website: https://www.floragrubb.com/visit-la

Please note: I brought my own fruit, veggies, and props to the Flora Grubb Gardens. I did pluck a grapefruit from the tree there, but used my own to eat from (there were a lot of grapefruits that had fallen to the ground, so I didn't feel too guilty picking just one -- which I left behind.) Finally, I bought the flat of lettuce used in the video. Although I must fess up to noshing a handful of kumquats during several visits to the nursery.

To make your own Wanted Poster like mine above, click here (and upload a photo.)

BLT Sandwich - Bacon, Lettuce & Tomato

 Bacon everything! At the spear end of the bacon fad is the BLT Sandwich. Bacon seems to return every few years as a popular ingredient. It does go back a way as a sandwich ingredient that really came into its own when G.I.'s returned from WWII. 

BLT means Bacon, Lettuce, and Tomato Sandwich in the restaurant world and the public soon adopted it, too. I remember making them with leftover bacon from breakfast. 

What's so great about the sandwich is how simple it is. Just fry or bake up a few slices of bacon, toast some bread, and slide the bacon between two slices smeared with mayo, and add sliced tomato and lettuce. It's a crunchy first bite.

I jumped back into the BLT game when I saw Hickory Smoked Uncured Turkey Bacon by Applegate Naturals at my local 99c only Store last year. I jumped on that deal big time and bought five packages to freeze. I haven't seen this Bacon again there, that's why you have to buy a good deal when you first see it because they will not be there for long!

Right away I made a Bacon, Lettuce, and Tomato Sandwich. Simply delicious. While pork bacon is the gold standard, this uncured turkey bacon hit the spot. It is a lighter and meatier sandwich without the thick veins of pork fat of regular bacon. The smokey flavor is still there, and I didn't miss the porkiness. 

Turkey Bacon does not have the crispness of cooked bacon, the texture is closer to fried thin slices of ham. But the Turkey Bacon BLT still rules. 

Small 4-slice packages of real Bacon still show up at my local Dollar Tree. And 4 slices are just enough for a sandwich or two. 

Lettuce and tomato are affordable. I even find small jars of mayo cheaply. 

Make a BLT with any favorite bread. Of course, I get mine from the day-old bargain bin at my local supermarket, Ralphs. White, wheat, sourdough, or rye...go for it. 

A BLT is constructed with toasted bread. I used a popup toaster so both sides of each slice are crunchy.

I usually fry my Bacon slices, but you can bake them as well. I learned to bake bacon at a lower temperature, about 325 degrees or less, so the bacon grease doesn't get all over the place (you could loosely cover the bacon with parchment paper, too.)

Turkey Bacon

How do you assemble your BLT? Is Bacon on the bottom or top? How about 2 slices of bacon on top and 2 slices on the bottom. Any way you stack it will work! 

My video recipe is just a reminder for you about how tasty a BLT Sandwich is - go ahead and revisit a real American Diner classic, and don't forget the Campbell Tomato Soup...from the can (they are now low in sodium.)

BLT Sandwich - VIDEO             Play it here, video runs 2 minutes, 36 seconds.

My YouTube video link for viewing or embedding, just click here.

Ingredients (one sandwich)

• Bacon - 2 to 3 slices. Enough to cover a slice of bread. Regular bacon or any favorite substitute.
• Bread - 2 slices. Any type you like. I toast mine.
• Lettuce - a leaf of lettuce, just large enough to cover the bread. Okay to shred or chop lettuce.
• Tomato - a couple of slices, depending on the size of the tomato. Enough to cover a slice of bread. Okay to use sliced cherry tomatoes.
• Mayonnaise - Apply on the inside of one or both slices of bread.

Directions

Start by frying or baking bacon slices. If you are using a substitute like Turkey Bacon then add a teaspoon of oil to a frying pan so Turkey Bacon does not stick to the pan. 

Fry bacon until crisp on both sides. Usually takes about 5 minutes in total.

As bacon cooks, slice tomato and wash lettuce leaf if necessary. Pat dry or shake off excess water from the cleaned lettuce leaf. 

You can toast the bread just before the bacon is done cooking. Toast bread slices as browned as you like.

To assemble BLT, just smear mayo on toast on one or both slices. 

Stack lettuce, tomato, and cooked bacon in any order you like. 

2015 Best Food Finds at 99c only Stores

You never know what edibles you'll find at the local 99c only Store - everything from a package of Chia Seeds to a large container of frozen Chicken Livers. And here are some of the best, or at least, the most unusual Food Finds of 2015 that I've run across.

Even seaweed snacks have made an appearance. You know what they are right? They are super thin sheets of dried seaweed - they dissolve in your mouth like  the host given to Catholics during the Eucharist - or those sheets of breath mints.

As a joke I gave out some to Halloween trick or treaters. Well, I had a fight on my hands when a group of teenage tricksters actually shoved at each other to get a package! I guess dried seaweed snacks have been discovered by the next generation, and good for them.

The 99c only Stores cater to local ethnic enclaves here in Los Angeles, especially Latin and Middle Eastern.

While this Mole may not taste like homemade to transplanted Oaxacans, you can't beat the price. Mole is a complex blend of spices and chilies, really too complex for the average cook to make. I found small boxes of it, and it tastes fine, especially paired with a nice fillet of chicken.

They also sell plantains ready to ripen for sweet fried bananas. I've made them to accompany my Cuban recipes, like tender Roast Pork and Black Beans. I also see peeled and frozen packages of Yucca, a potato-like starch that Central Americans go for.

Click on any photo to see larger.

Whole pomegranates appeal to Middle Eastern tastes buds. I like the sour/sweet pulp. Inside the cardboard hard shells there are tiny fruit lozenges with seeds, and you eat the bright red flesh with seeds - quite tasty. I made an cute video with my neighbor Bob's 4 year old daughter, Lola, where we try to get her to eat some. You can see it here.

My go-to drink of choice is Diet Cran-Pomegranate by Ocean Spray made with real fruit juice. They have carried it here for the last few years. After work I sometimes add it to a shot of gin over ice.

My beer of choice are 16 ounce cans of Henninger Beer from Germany. They don't carry it all the time and I always stock up when they do. It's a light crisp pale lager that goes down easy. I found another refreshing beer on sale once called Chang, from Thailand.

I've lucked out a few times with the frozen fare that comes in. I liked the Veggie Lasagna from Stouffer's and a Whole Grain Pilaf from Luvo. While the servings are small, the quality and taste are superior.

And there are always cans and jars of premade pasta sauce.

The hot sauce du jour is Sriracha, originally bottled in nearby Irwindale. Huy Fong Foods did not copyright the name so the Sriracha lable and flavor is turning up everywhere, like in ketchup and mayo.

99c only Stores offer a wide variety of fresh fruit and veggies, sometimes it's even organic. You can pick up packages of tomatoes, potatoes, mushrooms, lettuce and onions.

As for fruit, how about whole pineapples for 99.99 cents! They even carry coconuts - good luck cracking them, though. I usually settle for Coconut Chips.

Now don't rush out to your local 99c only Stores hoping to find all of the above. The preferred stock that comes through, often goes right out the door quickly, so that's it. When I find a great deal I stock up -- shopping there keeps you on your toes!

I hope you have had a year of bargains, too. Just stick with me and I'll keep pointing out all the money saving food items, that make up my cheap$kate recipes, I find this coming New Year!

Fake Crab Louie Salad

All rise please, the King of Salads is here: Fake Crab Louie!

A typical Crab Louie uses real lump crab meat. Well, you'll have to settle for fake crab in my recipe. Notice in the animated GIF above, my Royal Cheap$kate's Crown is made of cardboard -- so you won't have to hock the Queen's jewels to pay for the simple salad recipe ingredients.

This salad is old school steak house cuisine that originated on the West Coast around the 1900's. There is debate over where it first came together, either San Francisco or Portland, Oregon. You can read all about it by clicking here.

Almost anyone can afford a head of iceberg lettuce, a couple of tomatoes, a hard-boiled egg or two, and a few stalks of asparagus. Asparagus can be expensive out of season, but I find it quite often at my local 99c only Store. Of course, you can substitute with any cheap veggies you find on sale, like broccoli.

I don't eat sliced boiled eggs on my salads, but since making this recipe, I'm going to keep a few in the refrigerator from now on.

You can get fake crab (or, krab) for around 3 bucks per pound in a typical grocery seafood chilled case. And for this recipe, I only use half a pound to make enough for 3 salad servings. As usual, I get frozen 8-ounce packages of imitation crab meat at my local 99c only Store.

 Click on any photo to see larger.

One thing about frozen imitation crab is it can dry out a bit. If that is the case, I have an easy fix. After it's defrosted, just sprinkle a little water on the krab and microwave in 10-second increments until the krab is warm, but not hot. It will soften and tenderize nicely. The texture will go from stringy and mealy to sweet and supple.

Go ahead and bring Fake Crab Louie into the 21st Century with cage-free eggs, heirloom tomatoes, specialty lettuces, even kale - wait a second, let's go back a few centuries, before big industrial food production began! 

I also have an easy Homemade Louie Salad Dressing comprised of sour cream, ketchup, and hot sauce. You can use store-bought Thousand Island dressing if you like.

 

This Socialist Chef is against all aristocracy, whether it's tax dodging corporate oligarchs, the hoarding moneyed elites, or European royalty - it's all balderdash. However, I will not abdicate my standing as the Earl of Tightwad, dispensing bargain recipes any plebeian can afford. And, until we all come to our senses and become a real sharing economy, I guess there will always be a seat at the culinary table for The 99 Cent Chef.

So read on and allow me to introduce to you my recipe for Fake Crab Louis with Homemade Louie Salad Dressing.

Ingredients (2-3 salad servings, depending on size of a head of lettuce)

• Fake crab (krab) - 8 ounces or half a pound. Okay to use more or less to suit your budget. You can even use real cooked lump crab meat, if your ship comes in, you get a raise, or marry into royalty.
• 2 to 3 eggs - boiled and peeled.
• Lettuce - one head. Okay to use any favorite salad greens like: kale, Romain and spinach.
• Asparagus - about half a pound. Okay to use as much as you like. You can even leave it out if it breaks the budget. Substitute with cheaper veggies like broccoli and carrots.
• Tomatoes - 2 to 3, depending on the size. Okay to use cherry tomatoes.

Louis Dressing (or use store-bought Thousand Island dressing)

• 3 tablespoons of sour cream or mayo - I used sour cream for this recipe. Okay to use low-fat.
• 1 tablespoon ketchup
• 1/2 teaspoon hot sauce - I used Sriracha Hot Chilli Sauce. Okay to use any favorite hot sauce. Mix in a little at a time to reach the desired spiciness. Okay to use horseradish instead of hot sauce. Hot sauce is optional if your tolerance for spiciness is low.
• 1/4 onion, minced or grated - optional. I used a yellow onion. Some recipes call for sweet pickle relish, so it's okay to add a tablespoon or two.

Directions for Homemade Louie Dressing (okay to use store-bought Thousand Island Dressing)
Add 3 tablespoons of mayo or sour cream to a bowl. Squeeze in a tablespoon of ketchup.

For heat, mix in half a teaspoon of your favorite hot sauce. Add a little at a time to reach the desired hotness. It's okay to leave it out as well.

Fine chop, mince, or grate 1/4 onion. This is an optional addition; dressing will be delish even without onion. Some recipes call for sweet pickle relish - add a tablespoon and see if you like it that way.

Mix the Louie Dressing ingredients well. Keep refrigerated until ready to serve.

Directions for Fake Crab Louis Salad
Low boil 2 to 3 eggs for about 10 minutes until cooked through. Of course, you can boil the eggs any way you like, from semi-soft to a hard-boiled yolk. Cool down eggs with ice water when done, or they will continue cooking. For semi-soft egg yolks, it's okay to add them to salad while warm.

Slice off about an inch of each asparagus stalk. In a large pot or pan, add enough water to almost cover the asparagus. Simmer asparagus about 3-5 minutes until stalks are soft and tender. Cooking time will vary depending on the thickness of the stalks. Just try one out when you think they are tender.

You may need to remove even more stalk after cooking. It's hard to tell how much of the stalk is tough and stringy until the asparagus is cooked. It's okay to slice off even more of the stalk after cooking. You don't want to overcook the tender heads, or they will be mushy.

Add done asparagus to an ice bath or cold water to stop cooking.

Rinse, then roughly shred, or chop, your favorite lettuce. Slice tomatoes.

Prepare the fake crab (or krab). Just roughly shred it. If krab is frozen, it may be tough when defrosted. If so, drizzle it with a teaspoon of water, then zap it in the microwave in 10-second increments until krab is warm and tender. You don't want to cook the krab until hot, just warm it up to absorb some moisture.

Now time to bring it all together.

Layer or mix the lettuce, tomato, asparagus, sliced egg, and krab, and finally top with Homemade Louie Dressing (or Thousand Island Dressing).

Hindsight
Okay to make the salad your own. Use any specialty lettuce and heirloom tomatoes. And if you are flush with cash, or want to impress a date, then use real lump crab meat. I used an 8-ounce package of imitation crab.

You can also use any fresh or steamed veggies you like, including carrots, broccoli, spinach, or cauliflower.

Asparagus can be expensive, so it's okay to substitute it with another veggie, or just leave it out.

You can add a little sweet pickle relish to Homemade Louis Dressing. Okay to use horseradish instead of hot sauce. And you can leave out hot sauce or horseradish if your tolerance for spiciness is low.

Okay to assemble salad a few hours ahead of meal time.